Who am I?

The past weeks I was so busy and probably so happy as I haven't posted anything.

Lately I was thinking about my future. About my own life. I must not start something just because I wanna be close to someone. Right? Because if half-way I am left..... I would be in a big trouble.
I gave myself time to think about it. And I tried to imagine myself in any kind of roles.





The more I think about it the more I am sure I want to go back to school. And the more I am excited about it the more I want to have a profession and know who I am.
If anybody asks me Who are you? I want to answer it.
I got myself ready to do it alone. Because I am always being warned that nothing lasts forever. And what if an important person in my life turns to be an asshole. And that I should not plan or count on anybody in my life. Bla bla bla.

Plus I really wanna change my life. I dont like being here. I just dont.
.

One lesson: You can be all over about something. But keep it to yourself. And try to talk about everything. Otherwise you will be one of those people called "boring".

And I believe that I need at least 5 years to have a super duper strooooong version of me. I am still shy and I am rather a lady and not a woman. I know that through the years it will definitely change. I have already changed the past one year.

However I have so many dreams. And I wanna travel and go everywhere in the world with my future husband. And hell enjoy life. But when to have baby? Specially if I end up being alone during university. Daammmnnnn I dont even think about it. I just end up imagening myself as an old single bag with her dogs and cats as a baby substitutions.
That simple to make me happy. Gimme dog and that's it.
I am so fulfilled with positivitity and everything good that sometimes not even I understand the reason of it. Maybe it is one person who makes me the happiest lady by knowing I make him happy too.Or to know that I can be at home wearing nothing but a tshirt and a short having my ugliest face on and still confidently say " I am the pretty one. "

My friend bought yesterday a dress and said "I look forward to be taken out for a dinner by my boyfriend in this dress. "  Oh how cute is that. I wanna have such a lifestyle in the future. To have quality time. When we just go out for no special reason. Just to enjoy each other's company.
Though I am pretty sure that when I will have my own home, my kitchen is going to be fabulous. I wanna have such nights when I am waiting for my husband to get home from work and I just make an ammmmazing dinner as a suprise.
I do not wanna be an average woman with an average life.