update, busy busy tired, OLDER

yeeeeeey I disappeared I know. But I had no energy to write.... at all....  I am so busy. I leave home at 7-8 and got home around 19:00. I can't even get to the library. They keep charging me. FML
in the weekend I will be able to go there. And pay all the fees..... damn it....

Im studying for my classes and for my training. Which is both... I dont mean hard..... rather a lot. But I know all I need is time. day to day I know about this more and more. Im reading every day. (specially today and monday) yesterday I had no time. craaaaaap! But now it's fine. classes at uni are gone untill wednesday!
I actually enjoy this training, I mean i find it intresting and everything. so just head up!

The only one thing that  makes me sad, that I have no time to go to the gym. I am too tired.  I look forward the better weather.... It's more different to just go out and start jogging than go to gym, change clothes go to the equipment, then change, then change clothes, come home take shower... takes toooooooo much time. and also expensive. Jogging is for free! And I prefer....!
And I prefer working out at home. I actually have just found out a completly new exercise! YAAAY

And.. I had my birthday. I am older! YAY!!!  I am so happy. sooo it means, it's time to change. I know I said a lots of new things on the new year resolutions. But It's birthday. It's more important. For me. I guess.. :-)

With one of my friend I talk much less. Which is sad actually, but.... i can't do anyhing. The story about this shit is all about the 'more than friendship' stuff. He wanted to have more than I can offer. And since that day we dont talk. How can a friendship turn into this? Anyway it's fine. Things have to be accepted sometimes.

Friday White angeeeel! I am not sure I should go, because I have to do so many things even at saturday. So I m still pending about this. In this state im going. But tomorrow most likely I will be busy again untill night, so maybe I wil say 'fuck it im tired wanna get into bed. " I dont know yet.

hair + eyeglasses .. no sense post

Amour

I have just watched a movie. I dont really know why. I guess by curiousity. I have no thoughts, nor feelings. Im just wondering how life is going to be. This movie was beautiful BUT shokking. Im still feel odd. i suggest everyone to watch it. AMOUR

It's unbelievable how 2 ppl can love each other. What is the crime of a murder? It means love and protection or viciousness and hatred? A cure or a disease? Probably someone will never understand. However this movie brings close the feeling.

coffe and bye-byes

I know, I have been talking about the gym, sport and body a lot, but I need. Because this is the way I am reminding myself. So excuse me please to come up with this again. But today! I was in the gym. In the morning. I never go in the morning, but since I am determined to give up drinking coffee, I felt like, I must go to gym, and make myself sure, I am completed without coffee.

Nope. Didn't work. I actually almost fall asleep on the treadmill. Then when I was lifting weight, I almost fell off of the equipment. So as I arrived home, finally I filled myself with coffee. Sorry dear, I gave up using sweeteners.Coffe is going to stay in my life. Something for something.

Dear spring, please come faster!

Conclusion.. Even if it didn't work, at least I met with 2 lovely, handsome and nice boys. + I did something for my body and health. So indeed my day started perfectly!

I have still an exam. This is a piece of a lovely cake. Im not afraid of it. And sounds weird, but I actually wait for the school. Now, I have been studying. And now suddenly. It's done. END. I feel like something is missing. This is what I felt during summer. I was wasting my time.
In this semester, I learned how to manage my time. How to deal with this, and how to use every single moment. Which is awesome.

I like making long-term plans. I dont mean that I dont plan my next day, or next week. But I prefer making plans for the next year, or next 3 years. Because I most likely can influence those ones. For example let's say, I plan to be able to speak swedish for the next month. mmm.. I can try, but I know my abilities. Wont work. But if I say one year....Might be!

It's only seventeen days and bye-bye teen-years for good. I will miss you, but let me admit, Im glad youre gone. I step into my twenties. My early twenties.
This is gonna be the "do what I have always wanted to do" decade. I dont mean now the "scream in the library and let's see what happens" or "start singing in the middle of a lecture, and let's see what others reaction" (however I still do wonder what would happen)
...I mean, in this 10 years, I would like to put something on my table. To prove, "some of my dreams are meant to come true"

crying on a movie?!

Nowdays...If I watch a movie.. 99% I cry. I remember, when I was younger, I could not cry on a movie. Not at all.
I was wondering what changed. What I felt then, and what im feeling now. And I found the answer! I cry on those movies, when I know the way the character feels, because I have already experienced. And her feelings or life that happensto her I think (even if I dont say. NOW I THINK, but without being aware) of my feelings. And feel like, what if it happens to me again, or what if it will happen to me in the future?
I was crying on several love stories,or family stories.
Yesterday I was watching a cartoon. Well this is a good one. TIM BURTON. If someone knows him, then also knows his cartoons are AWESOME. I loved this moovie. And did made my cry. aaaaaaaw...

My poor lost pets. I totally, completly, and truly felt the way he felt.....! Now I have only Promise, and Iover her. I would love to get a dog as well. My life just not completed without pets.

I have only one exam left. So I am happy. Reeeeally happy. I started getting ready to my English language exam. And also started revise my German. I've got my timetable, and it's really good. I will be able to take pre-exams. Like 4 out of 8! YAY!
Yesterday I was in the gym, then went to the sauna. It was AWESOME. Most likely, I will go today as well.  When school startes, I will go to the gym before my classes. Because probably after school I will be busy with other stuffs.